Monday, September 23, 2013

My Wife Does Have A Point

Being married to a very talented and skilled seamstress, I get to enjoy tailor-made clothes that would normally cost a small fortune. She is usually busy making something and in between all the fancy dresses for weddings and such, all the intricately designed quilts, and all the other elaborate projects; from time to time, I’ll get a nice western-style shirt. Just one of the perks and it suits me quite well. She does have a knack for sewing.

As a seamstress, it is also completely fitting that my wife would have a proclivity for pins. Stick pins. Sharp, little objects that come in handy for a lot of different things - so she claims. Not only does she use them in her sewing, but for some reason she has an almost evil affinity for poking things with them, including me! From early on, I learned to stay clear of her when she is sewing! That can prove to be a difficult chore when it’s time to try something on. But, I know her and can usually tell when she’s about to stick it to me!

But not always. Particularly, when she manages to carry out her scheme while she’s nowhere around. And a maniacal scheme it was.

She’d just finished a shirt that I had requested, a black on black embroidered shirt, and I couldn’t wait to show it off. I proudly put it on and as usual, in a hurry, we left for church. The shirt fit perfectly but something wasn’t right I soon discovered. New material is sometimes stiff and can scratch I knew, but this one seemed to be scratching a little more than normal. In fact, it almost felt like something was stabbing me in the stomach. I kept trying to change the position of the shirt - only to have the irritating pricking sensation change too.

Finally, after a couple of hours or so, I said something to her and she checked to see what the problem was. And found it - a pin! It had been poking me the whole time. (My stomach looked like I was a diabetic or something with little tiny red dots all over it). Laughing - a little too much - my wife removed the offending pin. Ah!

No, I really don’t think she did it on purpose. However, she got entirely too much amusement out of the whole deal. All at my expense! And of course, I had to confiscate the pin for the ride home - you just can’t trust the woman with a pin in her hand!

On second thought, I’m not sure I’m getting such a good deal on the clothing after all. It might be better to just pay the small fortune for my tailor-made shirts.

To be fair, it was just a one-time thing. But, that might be because these days, I know to check my clothes thoroughly before putting them on. With a magnet!

Bruce A. Borders is the author of more than a dozen books. Inside Room 913, Over My Dead Body, The Journey, and Miscarriage Of Justice, and other titles, are available as ebooks on Apple I-Pad®, Amazon Kindle®, Barnes & Noble Nook® and Sony Reader®, Kobo, Diesel Books, and Smashwords. His books are also available in paperback at most online retailers or at The popular Wynn Garrett Series Books are now available on Barnes And Noble® at See Bruce’s Smashwords Profile at  #BruceABorders

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