Monday, January 30, 2017

Mouse Vs. Human

“I just saw a mouse run from behind the kitchen to the laundry room.”

That’s the text I received from my wife last week. We’ve known for a few weeks we had a mouse and I put out several traps. But the traps were not effective. I think mice are getting smarter than they used to be. But I should be smarter, right?

I used to be pretty good at catching mice. A lot of times I’ve captured ten or more in a single night. Of course, it helps when the house has so many mice that you can practically catch them by hand. I didn’t keep track of the total number I caught but it didn’t seem to make any difference anyway. It was like trying to clean up a truckload of sand one grain at a time—with a new truck coming in every day.

But we don’t live in that house anymore and we haven’t had much of problem with mice these days. Occasionally, when we’d find evidence of them, I’d put out a trap, or two, and that would be it. But this time... nothing.

So, after getting my wife’s text, I made another trip to the store. I came home with a variety of traps. They are now set and I’m waiting. Waiting to see if I am smarter than a mouse. Wish me luck ’cause so far, the mouse is winning. ~

Bruce A. Borders is the author of more than a dozen books, including: Inside Room 913, Over My Dead Body, The Journey, Miscarriage Of Justice, The Lana Denae Mysteries, and The Wynn Garrett Series. Available in ebook at www.amazon.com/Bruce-A.-Borders/e/B006SOLWQS and paperback on Amazon, Barnes & Noble and Books-a-Million. Bruce A. Borders is a proud member of Rave Reviews Book Club.

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Monday, January 23, 2017

Toy Story

I remember as a kid, around age two or three, I used to think I couldn’t sleep through the night without a whole array of toys to keep me company. I’m not sure if it was not wanting to be without my toys all night long or if having them in bed with me made me feel not so alone. Whatever the reason, at that age, I was usually surrounded by stuffed animals, action figures, cars and trucks, and whatever else I could find before the dreaded bedtime arrived.

I thought I’d left that stage behind long ago but for the last several years, one of our dogs has been doing his best to take me back to my childhood. He seems to think I need as many chew toys as he can find, as well as anything else he can drag into bed. Since I work nights, my wife (and the dogs) are sleeping when I get home. And my side of the bed is usually piled high with various and sundry dog toys. I guess he feels sorry for me or something. And yes, I have tried taking them off the bed but that doesn’t work. He just waits until I’m asleep and them brings everything back.

And recently, my grandson is getting in on the act. He spends most Saturday nights at our house and lately has started piling his toys on the headboard. Last night, I counted thirteen different gadgets and gizmos (yes, times and kid’s toys have changed) lined up—on my side of the bed, of course. This is in addition to the dog’s toys.

Between the two of them, I’m well prepared, you know, just in case insomnia strikes. My grandson even told me one night that he put the toys there, so I could play with them if I  woke up before morning. I suspect his generosity may have been just to keep me happy—and make sure I didn’t move the toys.

Thing is, I’d be perfectly happy sleeping without things falling on my head during the night. Or, waking up with a sharp pain in my side after sleeping on a toy tractor. Or, having one of the electronic gizmos start buzzing in the middle of the night.

I guess they, the dog and the grandson, are just trying to keep me young. It’s working too, I think, because here I am thinking back to when I was two or three years old and reliving the past. ~

Bruce A. Borders is the author of more than a dozen books, including: Inside Room 913, Over My Dead Body, The Journey, Miscarriage Of Justice, The Lana Denae Mysteries, and The Wynn Garrett Series. Available in ebook at www.amazon.com/Bruce-A.-Borders/e/B006SOLWQS and paperback on Amazon, Barnes & Noble and Books-a-Million. Bruce A. Borders is a proud member of Rave Reviews Book Club.

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Monday, January 16, 2017

Out Past Curfew

When I was a teenager, the town we lived in had a ten o’clock curfew. No one under eighteen could be out past ten. And yes, they did enforce it. And they didn’t offer much leniency. One of my friends received a citation for working on his dad’s car one night—because it was on the street and that meant he wasn’t in his yard. And his dad was there! Even going to or from a job was not a legitimate excuse for breaking curfew.

As you may know, I was never good with restrictions, especially stupid ones, so this type of insanity was bound to create problems. When I asked my dad what I should do if I “had” to be out past ten, (hypothetically, of course) he gave me some wise advice: “Don’t get caught, I guess.”

At the time, I had a job working at a grocery store and sometimes didn’t get off until ten or later, which played right into my recalcitrant nature. Usually, I walked the few blocks to the house and most nights I made it without any problem. But there were a few occasions when I had to elude a police car or two.

One particular night, I wasn’t paying attention and didn’t notice the cop until he pulled alongside the curb. Before he had a chance to get out, I took off. Still a couple of blocks from my house, I ran up the nearest driveway, crossed through a row of bushes, and then cut through the neighbors’ yards until I reached my house.

Figuring I’d lost the cop, I calmly walked around to the front door (the only door my key fit). And surprise, there was the cop parked right in front of my house. Thinking I had been caught, I expected the car door to open at any second but I kept heading for my front door. Only after I’d unlocked the door did I look at the cop car again—and in the streetlight, noticed it was empty. Then, just as I was closing the door, I saw the officer come around the corner of my house. Apparently, he’d circled the block and not seeing me, had gotten out to search on foot.

Not able to resist having a little fun, I turned on the porch light, noisily opened the door, and stuck my head out. “Can I help you?” I asked.

I think he probably knew I was the guy he’d been chasing but there must have been at least a little doubt in his mind. With a perplexed frown, he asked if I’d seen anybody outside my house in the last few minutes.

I shrugged and said, “You.”

Nodding slowly, the cop said okay and after giving me a long stare headed to his car.

Smirking to myself, I closed the door, just as my dad came into the living room wanting to know what was going on. “Cops are looking for someone,” I told him. “They wanted to know if I’d seen anybody outside just now.”

“You were just outside,” my dad said with a look that said he knew I was up to something.

“Yep.”

I saw him look at the clock, so I’m pretty sure he figured out what was going on. But he didn’t ask any more questions so I didn’t offer any other explanation. However, I was fully prepared to tell him I was just following his advice when he’d said, “Don’t get caught.” ~

Bruce A. Borders is the author of more than a dozen books, including: Inside Room 913, Over My Dead Body, The Journey, Miscarriage Of Justice, The Lana Denae Mysteries, and The Wynn Garrett Series. Available in ebook at www.amazon.com/Bruce-A.-Borders/e/B006SOLWQS and paperback on Amazon, Barnes & Noble and Books-a-Million. Bruce A. Borders is a proud member of Rave Reviews Book Club.

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Sunday, January 8, 2017

That's Cold

I thought I’d left behind the sub-zero temperatures when I moved from Wisconsin back to Oregon nineteen years ago. And I had, until this year. Not that it doesn’t get cold in Oregon, it does—but not usually where I live. Cold here means the thermometer is hovering around 25-30 degrees. But this year...

This year, things are a bit on the frigid side. The past week I saw a minus sign on the temperature WAY too much. Every day, I think. The coldest was -8, which for a lot of people, that might not be too bad but when I’m working outside, it’s COLD! Yes, I’ve been in much colder temps, even worked outside in them, but now that I’ve acclimated to a warmer climate, my body doesn’t deal well with weather that refuses to go above zero. Or, maybe I’m just older than I used to be.

If you saw last week’s post, you may remember I had a lingering cold, and I still do. It’s hard to get better with all the time I spend outside in this weather. Even when I get home from work, there’s shoveling to do.

But then, there is a bright side to all of my woes. My grandson loves to help grandpa shovel. Sometimes that means dumping a shovel full of snow on my head, or putting the snow back on the sidewalk I’ve just cleaned but the look on his face while he is “helping” makes it all worth it.

A few weeks ago, he was helping clear off the deck and behind me, I hear his sweet three-year-old voice say, “Grandpa, I’m really sorry. But, I love you.”

When I turned around to see what had happened, I was met by a huge snowball to the face. The light fluffy snow easily broke apart and found its way inside my coat and the filtered down my neck. I let out a gasp and after catching my breath, went inside to dry off and warm up. My grandson thought it was a slap-the-leg hilarious moment.

Yesterday, we were again shoveling off the deck and having learned my lesson, I didn’t turn my back to him. Of course, that didn’t deter the child. With no warning this time, he scooped up a shovel of snow and, as I’d taught him, threw it. Except it’s supposed to go over the deck railing. This particular shovel full came right at my head.

As I was trying to clean the snow off my hat and face and yes, down my neck again, I hear the little voice say, “Grandpa, do you remember that I love you?”

Yes, I did, I told him. In fact, I think I’ll remember he loves me for quite a while, probably every time I’m cold. And this year, that will be often. ~

Bruce A. Borders is the author of more than a dozen books, including: Inside Room 913, Over My Dead Body, The Journey, Miscarriage Of Justice, The Lana Denae Mysteries, and The Wynn Garrett Series. Available in ebook at www.amazon.com/Bruce-A.-Borders/e/B006SOLWQS and paperback on Amazon, Barnes & Noble and Books-a-Million. Bruce A. Borders is a proud member of Rave Reviews Book Club.




Monday, January 2, 2017

What's New?

Recently, I heard some guys on the radio discussing how much life had changed in the last twenty years. To make their point, one of the guys asked the listening audience to take a moment to reflect on where they, the audience, were and what they, the audience, were doing twenty years ago. “I think you’ll see your life has changed dramatically.”

So, I did what they suggested.

Twenty years ago today, I was driving a semi across northern Wisconsin, in freezing rain, pulling an empty trailer. It was the first time I’d driven a semi in freezing rain and I was moving pretty slowly. But no other trucks passed me so; I guess I wasn’t overdoing it on the slowness.

To make things worse, I had a horrible cold; eyes watering, sneezing, and coughing. So, not feeling well, I just plodded along. Eventually, I got to where I was going—only to be sent back the other way, over the same road. But at least I then had a load, which did help a little. Still, it wasn’t exactly a fun day. I remember thinking “I wish summer would hurry up and get here.”

And now, twenty years later, what am I doing? Well, at this very moment, I’m typing this blog post, but soon, I shall be heading to work. Work will consist of driving a semi across northern Oregon, in what is expected to be freezing rain, pulling an empty trailer. Then, once I get my load, I’ll head back the way I came. I currently have a horrible cold with all the debilitating symptoms along the ultimately lousy feeling that goes with winter. I keep thinking, “I wish summer would hurry up and get here.”

So, not much has changed. So far, not much “new” is happening for this new year.

I couldn’t very well tell my story to the guys on the radio, so I told you! Happy New Year! ~

Bruce A. Borders is the author of more than a dozen books, including: Inside Room 913, Over My Dead Body, The Journey, Miscarriage Of Justice, The Lana Denae Mysteries, and The Wynn Garrett Series. Available in ebook at www.amazon.com/Bruce-A.-Borders/e/B006SOLWQS and paperback on Amazon, Barnes & Noble and Books-a-Million. Bruce A. Borders is a proud member of Rave Reviews Book Club.

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