Not Out Of The Woods Yet

This past weekend, I had an opportunity to help my brother cut down a few trees. We spent most of the day on Saturday cutting, de-limbing, and cleaning up the mess—well, part of the mess, there’s still more to do. And more trees to cut.

I used to do things like this quite frequently and with no lasting effects. My dad and I used to spend a lot of days cutting and hauling wood—and most of the time, due to fire restrictions we couldn’t even use a chainsaw. Never seemed to bother me. But that was before I’d spent nearly a quarter of a century driving a truck. Truck driving, while somewhat stressful at times, can’t really be considered work. Not manual labor type work anyway. Needless to say—but as always, I’m going to say it anyway—I’m a little out of shape when it comes to actual work.

But, I’m too stubborn to let that get in the way. It just isn’t in my nature to NOT do something. Besides, I couldn’t very well let my brother do all the work. I guess I could, but that would kind of defeat the purpose of going to help him.

So after a long day of real work, when I arrived home, my wife asked me how my day went. I was ready with an answer. “This stuff was a lot easier in my twenties.”

She laughed and agreed that it probably was. She was nice though, and didn’t say that perhaps if I did this kind of work more often it wouldn’t be so hard on me. Although when I mentioned it, she seemed to agree with that also. And that’s why next Saturday, I’ll probably be going back for more punishment—or, work as it’s also known. ~

Bruce A. Borders is the author of more than a dozen books, including: Inside Room 913, Over My Dead Body, The Journey, Miscarriage Of Justice, The Lana Denae Mysteries, and The Wynn Garrett Series. Available in ebook at www.amazon.com/Bruce-A.-Borders/e/B006SOLWQS and paperback on Amazon, Barnes & Noble and Books-a-Million.

If I Could Only Fly

When I was a kid, maybe three or four years old, I used to wish I could fly. I saw how effortlessly birds flew and thought if they could do it then so could I. My parents told me I wasn’t a bird and could not fly so don’t try it. But, of course, I didn’t believe them. I wasn’t dumb enough to jump off a tall building or anything; I limited my attempts, my experiments, to leaping off porches and flapping my arms. As it turned out, my parents were right, I couldn’t fly, and I eventually gave up on the idea.

Last week, I spent a few days rebuilding a deck. This was a multi-level deck with stairs and railings—you know, the fun kind to work on! I’m not being facetious, I really do like doing carpenter work, and adding a little complexity to the equation just makes it better.

Part of the refurbishing included taking out the stairs, then rebuilding and relocating them. But first, I planned on using them to get everything to the upper portion of the deck. Once that part was mostly finished, I tore down the steps.

So, there I was, in the middle of the project, immersed in my work, and everything was going as planned. The old staircase was gone but having a bit of work left on the upper deck, I climbed up to finish it off. Then standing up, with my back to the steps—or where the steps used to be—I turned to head down. By the time I saw the empty space—and the big drop to the lower level—I was already committed. So, I just jumped.

Guess what? I still can’t fly! But the good news is, at age 51, I’m still able to jump off a deck, land on both feet, and not break anything in the process! ~

Bruce A. Borders is the author of more than a dozen books, including: Inside Room 913, Over My Dead Body, The Journey, Miscarriage Of Justice, The Lana Denae Mysteries, and The Wynn Garrett Series. Available in ebook at www.amazon.com/Bruce-A.-Borders/e/B006SOLWQS and paperback on Amazon, Barnes & Noble and Books-a-Million. 

Wait Just A Minute (Or Longer)

Spent two fun-filled days at Disneyland last week. It’s been a few years since my last visit and it was good to see that the place hasn’t changed much. They still have many of the same rides and attractions they always did. Still the same music playing, the same food, and the same aura of “The happiest place on Earth.” Unfortunately, there are also the same long lines as before. I think that’s the number one activity in any Disney theme park, standing in line. Or, maybe it’s walking.

According to my phone, I walked an average of twelve miles per day. Not that that’s bad, I could use the exercise. But still, that’s a lot of walking. I think perhaps they should install conveyors like the airports have. The conveyors could take everyone directly to the next attraction or, across the park.

Of course, since it’s Disney, the conveyors would have to be theme based with a realistic decor so they wouldn’t look so much like a conveyor. And maybe they could make them go faster—you know, make the conveyors fun, almost like a ride. But then, everyone would want to use them and there’d probably be a line.

I know; they’ll never implement such an idea. The large open areas and sprawling walkways, filled with throngs of people are there by design. This system forces people to walk past all the vendors, shops, and games, which entices them to spend money. It also helps to keep the people spread out through the park so as to decrease the number of thrill seekers waiting in line at the rides.

Of course, they could always add more rides; that too, would decrease the number of people standing in each of the other lines. But then that produces a conundrum. The shorter lines (and less waiting) would probably sell more tickets, which would mean more customers—and that would lead to longer lines. So, I guess it’s a catch-22.

On second thought, maybe I should let Disney worry about managing the operations of their parks. I’ll just stay home—where I don’t have to walk twelve miles every day and there are no lines in which to waste time waiting. ~

Bruce A. Borders is the author of more than a dozen books, including: Inside Room 913, Over My Dead Body, The Journey, Miscarriage Of Justice, The Lana Denae Mysteries, and The Wynn Garrett Series. Available in ebook at www.amazon.com/Bruce-A.-Borders/e/B006SOLWQS and paperback on Amazon, Barnes & Noble and Books-a-Million. 

Just Following The Rules

Home alone. Again. My wife, as she is prone to do, has left me. Not permanently—at least I don’t think so. I guess it remains to be seen though. Supposedly, she’s coming home today after a long weekend for a short vacation.

For now, it’s just the dogs and me. But they’re good company. Kind of. They seem to think it’s my fault their favorite person isn’t here. They’re sort of like my grandchildren who make no bones about it; they like Grandma better. But that’s okay, at least they like me! But as one of them recently told me, “I miss you when you’re gone and I’m a little sad but actually, I don’t like you as much.” Translation: It’s hard to compete with Grandma! I know how he feels. I’m rather fond of his grandma too. And no one can compete with her.

When this same grandchild visited this past Saturday, he was very disappointed that Grandma wasn’t home. And, he informed me that he was very sorry but he would not be visiting again until she was back. “It’s just not the same,” he said.

When I suggested I could come visit him, he shook his head. “Not if you don’t bring Grandma.”

“What if I just show up without her?”

He gave me a frown. “Grandpa,” he said sternly, “You don’t make the rules.”

So apparently, according to the “rules,” I’m not allowed to have visitors or visit anyone. And now you know why I’m home alone. ~

Bruce A. Borders is the author of more than a dozen books, including: Inside Room 913, Over My Dead Body, The Journey, Miscarriage Of Justice, The Lana Denae Mysteries, and The Wynn Garrett Series. Available in ebook at www.amazon.com/Bruce-A.-Borders/e/B006SOLWQS and paperback on Amazon, Barnes & Noble and Books-a-Million.

Free Of Charge

Ever notice how many things are run by batteries these days? Phones, cameras, power tools, doorbells, and; all these gadgets and more, have batteries. And I didn’t even mention all the toys that depend on battery power. Then of course, our cars use batteries too. Almost anything, that does anything, runs on a battery. But this is good because it allows for mobility—and in today’s world, we all need to be mobile.

The problem comes in when these many batteries continually run down. And we go searching for a charger. We charge up the batteries and all is fine. But in a (too) short amount of time, the batteries are low again. And so, we are locked in a constant state of recharge. An infinite loop.

I’m not sure about the rest of you but I get pretty tired of every device I own always needing to be charged. I know, if I’d just stop using them so much they wouldn’t require charging quite so often. But that’s not likely to happen—for me or anyone else. We’ve all grown accustomed to using our little gadgets. But always looking for a charger or taking the time required to charge things can be a little annoying. I think it’s time to come up with a better way.

I said all that to say this: The other night I needed to make a call and I wasn’t sure how long the call would last; possibly a half an hour or so, I was thinking. My phone’s battery was low so I thought I give it a few minutes to charge before making the call because I like to be mobile. I have a habit of roaming while on the phone. Back in the day before cell phones, I used to have a twenty-foot cord on my phone so I wasn’t tethered to one spot while talking.

I gave it about ten minutes while I did a few other things, and then went to see how much battery power I had—and it hadn’t changed. The phone hadn’t charged at all. That’s when my wife pointed out that the charger wasn’t plugged in to the wall. She was rather amused I think. Me, not so much.

I did get to make the call—eventually. And as it turns out, it took only about four minutes; I wouldn’t have even had to charge the phone at all. Not until later anyway.

Oh, and one more thing. You may be wondering why the charger was unplugged. Well, that would be due to my wife needing the outlet—to charge her tablet. ~

Bruce A. Borders is the author of more than a dozen books, including: Inside Room 913, Over My Dead Body, The Journey, Miscarriage Of Justice, The Lana Denae Mysteries, and The Wynn Garrett Series. Available in ebook at www.amazon.com/Bruce-A.-Borders/e/B006SOLWQS and paperback on Amazon, Barnes & Noble and Books-a-Million.