Monday, October 21, 2013

That Depends

Let me say upfront that I’m glad I wasn’t my teacher in school. (Impossible, I know. Still, I’m glad). School for me was rather monotonous so, I always tried to make it more interesting. For some reason, my humor and extra effort weren’t always appreciated.

There are many instances that I could use to illustrate my point; the following is one of my favorites.

Grade school. A Science test. The state of matter. One section of the test listed ten or twelve substances, things like; gasoline, plastic, granite, helium, milk, etc. In the blank beside each one, I was supposed to write either liquid, solid, or gas. That seemed far too mundane to me, so instead I printed in very neat letters, “Depends on the temperature.” Imagine my “surprise” when the test was returned with every one of them marked wrong!

If this had been a few years later, I would have gotten away with it. My high school teacher had a sense of humor - or appreciated mine. Unfortunately, my fourth grade teacher did not. As far as he was concerned, my answers were incorrect.

Of course, I argued. After all, the test hadn’t specified what temperature I was supposed to use. If cold enough everything can be a solid - even if you have to go all the way to absolute zero (the theoretical temperature at which no heat is present in any particle, approximately –460°F in case anyone is wondering). And obviously, thanks to Newton’s Third Law of Thermodynamics, the equal and opposite must be true; if hot enough, everything can be a gas.

After several more minutes of discussion, which involved the whole class, the teacher gave up. Although he would not concede that I was right, he agreed to not mark my answers wrong. Same thing to me. However, he did go on and on about how in the future I should recognize when something is implied and form my answers accordingly.

Yeah, sure. I never did seem to learn that. To this day, when someone asks how long it takes to drive from one town to another - a question I get a lot, being a truck driver - I say, “Depends on how fast you drive.”

Bruce A. Borders is the author of more than a dozen books. Inside Room 913, Over My Dead Body, The Journey, Miscarriage Of Justice, and other titles, are available as ebooks on Apple I-Pad®, Amazon Kindle®, Barnes & Noble Nook® and Sony Reader®, Kobo, Diesel Books, and Smashwords. His books are also available in paperback at most online retailers or at www.bruceabordersbooks.weebly.com. The popular Wynn Garrett Series Books are now available on Barnes And Noble® at http://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/?series_id=867526 See Bruce’s Smashwords Profile at www.smashwords.com/profile/view/BruceABorders?ref=BruceABorders  #BruceABorders

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